It’s impossible to offer destructive criticism and love someone at the same time.
Whereas constructive criticism can be encouraging and helpful to others, most criticism is quite destructive. Destructive criticism attempts to deflect the attention from the real issue, which might be something as basic as jealousy. Destructive criticism takes the attention away from the person doing the criticizing, and that may be where the real problem lies. Destructive criticism also comes out of a heart where love is lacking, at least in that moment.
Love is actually the antidote for destructive criticism for this reason. Destructive criticism is motivated by fear–fear of being discovered, fear of being criticized, or fear of having to be open and honest. When you are motivated by love, you are less likely to be critical of others, because you will have their best interest in mind.
Such love has no fear because perfect love expels all fear.1 John 4:18